So, for the record, I am not an English teacher and, neither I nor my husband is in the military. (Read statement above.)
But it gets a bit irritating to have almost everyone you meet assume that you are one of those two things. Even after they ask you why you are here and you tell them.And, it’s not just Koreans. In fact, it’s rarely Koreans who make this assumption.
I went with my “counselor” from the relocation agency to get my Korean driver’s license last week. While there, we ran into another American, a professor at a university in Seoul, who has been living in country for 10 years. (He says . . .)
He turned around to me, and asked, ‘Do you speak English? Can you tell me which of these is the right window for getting an international license?’
I do, of course, speak English, but had no idea which window was the correct one. My counselor, C, however, also speaks fluent English and Korean. (Which is why she was hired to help me out, and why she was sitting and standing next to me, and talking every where we went.) She leans in and tells him, in English, which is the right window. This, he completely ignores, following the advice of the Korean guy sitting next to him who was clearly misunderstanding what he was saying.
Anyway, we go downstairs to take my eye test and physical exam (consisting of following instructions to do one deep knee bend). When we return, the Professor has obviously had a great deal of trouble with the clerk behind the desk. We can hear him complaining across the room. He’s had to wait in two different lines… he already bought a stamp, now they want another …. blah, blah. And, I should point out that I know what he was saying because all of this is in English. Mind you, he is also now standing at the correct window. The one that C told him to go to the first time, which he ignored.
Finally, finishing his business, he comes back over to me for a chat.
“Are you North American?”
“Yes. I’m from the United States.”
“Oh, you’re an English teacher.”
“No, actually, I am here with my husband.”
“Oh, military.”
“No, actually, his compa–”
He cuts me off and goes on to bitch about how difficult an adjustment we’re going to have, how Koreans will lie to your face because they don’t have the same code of honor for foreigners that they do for Koreans. For example, he was told to go to the wrong window, and had to then find the right window just now. How I’m going to have to learn. But, my students will teach me…yadda.
All of this is in front of my counselor. Who, as I’ve mentioned, is fluent in English, and has been sitting next to me the whole time. And who very nicely tried to tell his dumb ass him to go to the right window to begin with.
Also, as I think I’ve mentioned, I. am. not. an. English. teacher! I don’t have students. If this is how well he listens in English, I can only imagine what kind of time the Koreans have had.
He then condescendingly proceeds to show me he’s going to buy the clerk a soda as an apology for “frustrating” her, then wishes me well and leaves. Never says one word to C who has been politely and silently taking this all in.
I realize that it was a hot day. That waiting in line at the DMV is no picnic in any country. But, dude, you have been here 10 years and still can’t figure out the Korean words for “international driver’s license?” Or, how to ask which one it is in Korean? David can already do that and he’s been here five months.
I wonder if most Koreans think Americans are all loud, self-important bombastic jerks who refuse to learn basic Hangul.
Somewhere in the United States, a Korean professor and a newly arrived grad student are talking. The professor rolls his eyes, ‘Oh, God, you’re going to have such a hard time here! These Americans . ..”
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Nathan B. 07.02.06 at 10:53 am
Ha! I loved this post. I’m particularly hard on foreigners who do nothing but bitch in their fossilized ways about Koreans and life here. Coming here was the best thing that ever happened to me, as it has been for at least two of my friends.
Jodi 07.02.06 at 1:25 pm
Good post. For those exact reasons, that is why I have very few foreign friends in Korea (by choice). I’m becoming more selective on who from the ex-pat community I hang out with.
San Nakji 07.03.06 at 7:41 am
That’s a great post. Live 10 years in a country and don’t learn the language. Wow, that’s smart! I bet if he ever goes home he will be the first to complain about all the Mexicans speaking Spanish in his country.
A majority of English speaking foreigners need a kick where the sun don’t shine. This obviously doesn’t include you are Nathan B! Keep up the good fight!
Brian B 07.03.06 at 9:18 am
My first couple of years here I thought, “Man, there’s sure a lot of weird foreigners in Korea.” Then after a while I thought, “Wait a minute! I’m in Korea. I’m a foreigner. Maybe I’m a weirdo too.” It frightened me.
Nowadays, I’ve fully embraced the crazy. I accept that I’m a weido foreigner, and life is so much better now, especially now that I’m not worried about trying to appear less crazy than the other people around me.
I’m fortunate to have a cross-section of friends from the various ex-pat “sub-sets,” teachers, military, business and “other.” Most are extremely kind and decent people who know a thing or two about getting along in a foreign country. The others…all I can say is they are jerks back home too.
Cat 07.03.06 at 9:41 am
Crazy is one thing. I don’t mind crazy (as long as it’s happy crazy and not violent, weapon-toting crazy.)
Oblivious and obnoxious is another, IMHO.
And my post was not really meant to highlight him as a typical American, but to point out that he might be having an atypical experience, and I was taking his warnings with a grain of salt.
I thought it odd that he didn’t thinkk anything about loudly denigrating the Korean character in a public place–a government office, no less–in a country where he’d been able to live for 10 years without learning much of the language. Presumably, he’d realize that there are quite a few English-speakers (or at least English-comprehenders) among those seated around him.
David 07.03.06 at 3:40 pm
It is very sad that Western ex-pats and legitimate English teachers have their reputation sullied by the less respectful Westerners, a large percentage who happen to be English teachers because it’s easy to get a visa, it’s one the easiest jobs to get, and it can also pay pretty well to boot.
Thus, the stereotype about English teachers gets created. This stereotype is especially harmful to the real English teachers who respect their job and are respectful people in general. They have to fight an uphill battle to (re)gain respect in the eyes of many Koreans and indeed, other Westerners.
As such, the Western non-English teachers try to distance themselves from the English teachers as if to say “I’m not one of them”. In some ways, it is elitist. Mostly, though, it is saying “I am not a negative stereotype and don’t have the time to show to you that I am indeed a respectful person, so I am putting distance between myself and other Westerners who are, (unfortunately), as a group, less respectful than they should be”.
Yes, it is somewhat elitist. But, it’s the most convenient explanation that can fit in a short conversation.
Rose Byrd 07.06.06 at 3:24 am
Great post, Cat! As the loving mother of your non-military husband and loving mother-in-law of your non-English teacher self, I face daily rude and inattentive co-workers,neighbors, “friends” who interrupt my prayer request for you guys there to say “Oh, they’re in the DMZ, huh?” and “Why doesn’t your daughter-in-law just teach English in a girls’ convent school since she majored in journalism?” See, Americans are so full of themselves and their assumptions about how everybody ought to be just like them that they are often unable to be respectful and attentive in their own backyards, much less in another country. Of course, David is right to remind me that I should resist my elitist tendencies simply because I am able to solve technical issues courteously and accurately with people who just arrive from Russia last month! Guess why? I listen with the mind and heart, not just the ears. But then I interrupt you guys when you are sharing an insight with me all to often! So, we all could use work listening with our whole beings much more of the time, can’t we?
Cat, my heart really went out to your “counselor” who was forced to hear all of that guy’s rudeness and ignorance. Please apologize to her on behalf of all of back stateside who hope we would do better in that guy’s shoes–after TEN YEARS in Korea, for cryin’ out loud!
stephane gautron 07.31.06 at 9:55 pm
‘I wonder if most Koreans think Americans are all loud, self-important bombastic jerks who refuse to learn basic Hangul.’
that describes it to the T. I was a teacher in South korea for 2 years!
and those are the very words i use to describe you!
also, i am in Japan, and i could say the same again!
dont curse Koreans! curse your anscestors and predecessors,
damn americans!
Cat 08.01.06 at 9:09 am
Actually, Stephane, I think you missed the point of my post and the other comments. We were not “cursing Koreans” we were lamenting the fact that Americans who behave badly give us all a bad reputation. I am sorry for your bad experience, if that is what you are describing.
Please refrain from posting derogatory remarks or profanity, please. I will delete such comments in the future and ban people who continue to do this.
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