A smell not even Skynyrd would sing about*

ZenKimchi’s post about eating the Korean dish 홍어 reminded me of one Hong Kong anecdote that I’d forgotten to blog about.

Our little adventure with Durios.

I could swear we took a picture of the package we bought, but David says no. This one features the Durios as sold in Thailand. Pic ripped from here.

For the unenlightened (and, boy, do I wish I were still among you), Durios are durian-flavored cookies. Like Oreos, but with durian. You know the fruit that they’ve banned on public transportation in Singapore and Malaysia because it stinks so badly? The fruit with the smell that people compared to rotting flesh?

That durian.

So, upon strolling through a quickie mart shortly after our arrival, what does my husband decide he wants to buy as our first taste of Southeast Asia? Three guesses, and the first two don’t count.

We return to the hotel with some crispy rice snacks, couple bottles of Diet Coke, and a package of Durios.

“I’ve always heard that the smell is bad, but the fruit is actually very good,” says my better half.

“Um, I’ve always heard that the smell is horrible and the taste is unique, which is not quite the same thing,” I reply.

I declined his invitation to partake and informed him that he could have the Durios all to himself. Several minutes later, however, I began to notice an interesting smell in the hotel room. Did we forget to change Susie? (For, like, a year?) No, no. That smell is coming from the just-opened pack of cookies! Across the room.

“That is foul!” I say. “That’s not even the real fruit. It’s just some synthetic, industrial flavoring and the smell is still foul! We have to throw it out.”

David concedes and throws the package in the waste bin in the bathroom. Problem solved. Or, so we think.

Later that night, I am coming back from a quick run to a nearby Park ‘n’ Shop to buy extra baby food and diapers. (I learned my lesson from this trip.) Upon entering the hotel room, I am knocked against the wall by a malicious odor. What on earth?! Our hotel room smells like five hundred dirty diapers left out in the sun—in the Sahara.

“How are you two still sitting here breathing? Those cookies have get out of this room—Now!”

David reluctantly complies. So many nights of soju-and-galbi fueled business dinners have permanently dulled his senses of taste and smell, I believe.

As evidence: David also sampled a plate of 홍어 on his recent trip to Busan and pronounced it “not that bad.” A taste that Joe, in his blog writeup, theorized might approach that of “licking a urinal.”

The taste wasn’t good, Dave admits, adding that he (out with two Korean guys) ate it mostly to “prove [he] was tough.” This is also Joe’s theory as to why the dish is so popular with the ajosshi set.

Suffice to say that if stranded on a desert island with only fermented skate and durian for sustenance, I’d probably starve. I have no problem admitting I’m just not that tough.

*Lame title reference here. And, now I have an earworm.